Living on a Seesaw: Grounding Ourselves During Uncertain Times
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Have you ever used a seesaw as a bench — just to sit and relax? And then, all of a sudden, someone sits on the other end and you’re shockingly lifted off the ground. That’s a bit what life in Israel feels like right now.
I’ve been going about my daily routine — work, home, the usual rhythm — and then suddenly: war with Iran. While we always knew it could happen, now it has happened. The ground beneath us feels unstable. There’s uncertainty. There’s fear.
So how do we stay grounded during a time like this? How do we rebalance ourselves on the seesaw through the constant ups and downs?
Here are a few thoughts — both personal and professional — as a trauma specialist:
1. Normalize What You're Feeling
Yes — when someone sits on the other side of the seesaw, you will go flying. It’s just physics. And as I write this, I’ve been interrupted by an incoming missile alert — a reminder of just how real and close this all is.
As Viktor Frankl said: “An abnormal response to an abnormal situation is perfectly normal.”However you’re reacting right now — whether it’s fear, numbness, overwhelm, or something else — it makes sense. It’s valid. These are extraordinary times.
2. Understand the Seesaw
On a seesaw, we want to hover near the middle — not constantly launched into the air, and not stuck at the bottom.
Being too high on the seesaw looks like anxiety, panic, and feeling overwhelmed.Being too low looks like numbness, dissociation, and disconnection.
Neither state is "wrong" — both are your nervous system trying to protect you. Anxiety sharpens awareness and prompts action. Dissociation shields us from emotional overload.
What matters is that we move through these states rather than getting stuck in them. Healthy regulation means being able to dip in and dip out, returning again and again to the middle ground — where we feel centered and present.
3. Name What You're Feeling
Fred Rogers famously said, “If you can name it, you can tame it.”Being able to acknowledge what you’re experiencing gives it shape — and containment.
Naming your feelings, even silently — “I feel scared,” “I feel numb,” “I feel angry” — can reduce their intensity. It also builds a bridge between your body and your mind.
4. Connect with Others
Never underestimate the power of human connection. It is one of the most powerful resources we have. The people in our lives can give us endless support to go challenging times.
Find ways to connect — whether through deep conversations or having a fun chill. Both are valid. Both can soothe. Choose the kind of connection you need in the moment.
5. Let Yourself Be Distracted
You don’t have to know everything. You don’t have to track every headline. A safe distraction — a walk (if safe), a playlist, a good laugh, a good book — can pull us out of hypervigilance and offer our nervous systems a much-needed pause.
6. Express the Feelings
For some people it’s through conversation, for others it's through moving the body - exercise or workouts. There’s no one right way. The point is to let it move through you.
7. Use Grounding Tools
There are many grounding techniques — and a simple one is breathwork.Try this:
Inhale for 6 seconds
Hold for 2 seconds
Exhale for 4 seconds
Repeat slowly while noticing the sensations of your breath
When we’re in trauma states, breath is often the first thing to change. Bringing awareness and control back to it can be a powerful reset.
8. Tap into the Ultimate Resource - Emuna, Bitachon, and Tefilla.
Lastly, the most powerful tool of all is to remember that we are in the hands of Hashem. A Father and King that is loving and only wants our good. The more we internalize it the more secure we will feel. It’s important to lean into that knowledge and reinforce it through learning, davening, and mitzvot.
In a world that keeps tilting beneath us, the goal isn’t to never move — it’s to keep finding our way back to balance.
Stay safe. Stay connected.
